It’s that weird feeling you get when you see a call and all of a sudden you think you’re at the wrong end of the stick but you ain’t! I mean, that’s a fucked up feeling. Here I am, reading and jogging and an unknown call spoil’s my mood.

I guess it was incubating when my sibling had a few problems with her relationship. When the psycho barrier of the guy was tipping, it was sounding dangerous. Somehow the after effects of those episodes latched on to me! Weirdly enough I wasn’t involved in the core crux of it. But that latent fear of someone trying to do wrong to me kind of latched itself in my head and it’s a real challenge to get it out.

I remember a friend of mine in college had the same problem, for reasons unknown I don’t know how he developed into it; but I sure know he had it. I feel him now! Totally. I mean, I don’t care about some random hillbilly calling me; because I don’t give a shit. But it’s my anxious feeling that I am battling out over here. I mean, the last thing I wanted was ” TELEPHONE PHOBIA”! What the hell? I’m laughing as well as calming myself.

Remember folks, problems can be weird as hell, but there is one way of fighting them. Taking it head on!

The Little Things Give You away

What’s in a name? Just a simple name? It matters not where it comes from but what it means. Well, that’s what comes to my mind when I wanted to start a blog. I wanted to show how different I am from the world, and well I thought to myself. No matter how many “great” articles or poems I produce; at the end, my name matters the most. That’s something which is of great importance.

I feel genuinely happy when people start to write and take a serious interest in exploring themselves on what they write about. People need that. They need to express themselves in these absurd times of social media illusion; now, when I say illusion I meant that people have reached a break even point where; we get it. We just want to share, love and show off. That’s perfectly fine! But with sharing pictures, moments, amazing inspiring stories; we just don’t share anything anymore! We hide our problems behind these perfectly edited Instagram pictures.

People need to find their way of expressing themselves. One of them is writing. And that must be encouraged amongst the youth of today who only care less about being themselves and care more about dressing up like a 27-year-old.  Now, I won’t be an old sod and say that you are dressing inappropriately but I say dress what you feel comfortable in. But yeah, there comes that time when we try to dress like people 15 years older to us.

Now the thing about kids is that they need help from the very beginning, because of our great education system. Pressure builds in from the start and it just keeps coming and coming until you find yourself on the noose. That needs to stop. It’s like a disease or a trend starting to plague everyone. People have to start talking about it. Kid’s need to open up to their parents, they need to stop the abuse, the substance abuse. Parent’s need to be a little broad minded about what their children are up to.

To anyone or everyone out there, you have kids, nephews, nieces, grandkids, friend’s kids, ask them to open up. Ask them to find something to express themselves; writing, painting, running, skating, swimming; so many to choose from! The world is filling up with the unnecessary stress created from the top up! It’s time to take it easy and take a steady step away from that ledge!

My favorite rock star, Chester Bennington passed away a couple of weeks ago. He was part of the band, Linkin Park. Beautiful music. The unsung heroes of the Millennium angst. The night, while I was mourning for Chester whilst playing one of his songs on my guitar; I asked myself, what can I do to save a life? To reach out and make people stop from killing themselves! Well, I couldn’t come to an answer. But I came to a theory.

If we start helping the people closest to us, little by little; you are making a big difference. Forget about the probability, the math for once. Even one person, if you just tell them that the world is not on your shoulders, you can influence a generation.

I’m going to help people in the best way I can.

Let there be love.


A friend from the north

For reasons unknown, I was browsing through my facebook messenger. It was a dull day, I was at my friend’s place and we were hardly doing anything productive as a group. The wind was blowing into that small computer room which in fact, ironically was the most happening place at nights. But this time it was different, it was boredom. Out of all the commotions happening inside our heads, the room was as silent as the cantonment library.  I happened to be on a surface which filled in all the roles for our numerous occasions, a dancefloor, bed, sofa, and a stage.  Sitting on it like a wriggling fish out of the water, I opened my phone. Now when you open your phone it’s generally to check if you’ve got any new messages or just browse because like the moment in which nothing is happening, seems like you have the same predicament on your phone as well. I browse through everything, Instagram, Facebook, Ninegag, Snapchat, In-shorts, The Hindu, and nothing is dazzling me!  The last place I would generally go to is facebook messenger. There’s something about facebook, I disconnected myself from it. There seem to be many friends but you just can’t talk to them because you don’t know them and it’s not like you can’t talk to them it’s just that it seems odd and as a social media platform that sucks. It comes down to the bottom line that I have many friends but I speak to a few and that’s the same with others. Its social media nature I guess. I try to see the list in which I can start up a conversation and I find something strange. There’s a girl on my list who I don’t know of. I have no memory of adding her or even sending an invite. No mutual friends exist. But she’s online and she’s my friend.


To be continued…

The human

It’s a pleasant day, the trees are swaying, the dogs are soaking in the winter sun and the birds are washing themselves up just fine. A human has a bone to pick with all this. A human is restless and irritated. 

The human looks at the sky and wishes he could fly. He looks at the bird and he envys and imitates the creature to its very mechanics. The human looks at the trees and creates buildings of rest. The human looks at the dogs and creates the best bed to sleep on. The human looks at the beasts of the wild and builds weapons of mass destruction. The human envies the fish and creates a pool of vast spaces for his liesure. The human imitates everything to become the dominant species. 

The human has no limits. Yet after every feat the human wants more. 

Have you failed recently? 

Could one long for faliure rather than success? It’s true. All those who fail become philosophers. But I am truly humbled. The mixed emotions of pain, agony, sadness amplified to amounts you cannot possibly perceive and here I am in a crowd expressing just one emotion, “nothingness”. 

It’s been a long time since I failed. And in such kind of an opportunity that has given me what I deserve. But am I going to cling on to this forever? Yes. Not for the wrong reasons. But I am going to use this as a reminder in the most realistic way to bring about a change in me. 

I have truly realised, that it’s all on you to perform at the right moment. How does one light the fire? Through happiness? No. It’s always lit during the most grim times of your life. And you better be proud about that. Be happy that you failed. Let it flow through. Take the lashing of defeat. For you have only lost the battle as the war is yet to be won. 


The cold ball of fire

Do me a favor, listen to yourself
Do you a favor? I’d love to help
Meeting new strangers
Is a surprise!
Fly me in danger
And I will comply

To those times where you feel alone
To those times where you could have gone
Let them go, let them fly
Where you can’t catch them with the eye
The sun will never set unless you want it to
The sea will rise if you deem it so
Don’t you ever look down
There’s more to you than a frown

Anticipating the forthcoming danger
Standing tall next to a ranger
Fierce as a wall, unbreakable
A heart of a lion, unshakable

The winter is on the horizon
It’s crashing down on the plains of Lunkala
Freedom has yet to be earned
The sweat of your brow and the strength of your back
Will put you where you want to be, on the right track


Searching for seashell

What makes a man? Is it vices? The enticement you get when he makes things look extraordinary? When he makes things look simple for you to believe that it might be worth the risk? Just open your eyes and lay your arms out as wide as you can and feel that warmth, that warmth which you feel when you’ve done all you could and the rest is UpTo the planet which keeps spinning until it’s time to stop? Does he have it in him to tell the woman that he loves her? Does he have it in him to chase his dreams and make the world a better place? Does he have what it takes to think of the unthinkable and win the unwinnable? If he wants to be a millionaire or a loving human being? There’s no ending to the possibilities of what you can achieve, it’s all out there. People do the unthinkable all the time, just step into the light and achieve your share of the glory even if it’s as little as bringing a smile to another human being or animal in their time of need. There’s no script for you to follow, just write on as you go along.